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me: "How can you recall food?" my mother: "If you don't, it recalls itself." [ view | more ]

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Category: bad-ideas

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most quoted re "bad-ideas": Jonathan North Washington (42), Tristan Alexander McLeay (17), other (15), oberon (11), Derek Gulas (7)

other categories found with "bad-ideas": food (25), sadness (23), stupidity (20), badness (17), gradschool (16)



Viewing 132 of 1459 Result(s)
[ sort: date / rating, ↓ ]


[link] heard: 8 June 2015
[edit] added: 9 June 2015

"I can't read my own code. If it stops working, I basically have to start over."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 28 December 2014
[edit] added: 28 December 2014

(23:34:45) vigneshv: 140 px :D

(23:34:54) firespeaker: vigneshv: I can think of words longer than that

(23:35:01) firespeaker: I have some 153px words

(23:35:17) sushain: (10:35:00 PM) firespeaker: I have some 153px words <- wait, was that random?

(23:35:30) sushain: or do you actually have a 153px word

(23:35:30) firespeaker: i.e., not a good measure of word-length ;)

(23:35:33) sushain: LOL

(23:35:34) sushain: ok

(23:35:35) vigneshv: ill change

(23:35:40) firespeaker: point made? ;)

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 11 November 2013
[edit] added: 11 November 2013

[11:42] <tw2113> did you scale it down to just 1 user ID?

[11:42] <jonorthwash> I suppose I could do that

[11:42] <tw2113> via something like phpmyadmin

[11:42] * jonorthwash whips up a query

[11:42] <tw2113> or if you're fancy, sequelpro

[11:42] <jonorthwash> real men telnet to the mysql port

[11:43] <Limp_Trizkit> telnet to the mysql port? psssh. real men open the DB files in a hex editor

[11:43] <myosotis> hex editors are just a crutch for stream editor n00bs

[11:43] <tw2113> i read my mysql databases in binary

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 30 June 2013
[edit] added: 30 June 2013

"But they're Russian tourists—they'll drink anything. It was probably petrol."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 19 February 2013
[edit] added: 19 February 2013

"Theremin ensemble? That sounds like the definition of Hell."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 16 December 2012
[edit] added: 16 December 2012

(21:39:17) firespeaker: but it's worth seeing what the people who've spent time on this think

(21:39:23) spectie: aye

(21:39:25) firespeaker: "particles" is probably not the way to go

(21:39:41) spectie: "particle" stands for "defeat"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 6 December 2012
[edit] added: 6 December 2012

(13:40:56) spectre: there is a special place in hell

(13:41:04) spectre: for linguists who design orthographies with the ' character

(13:41:53) spectre: (a) letters, (b) punctuation

(13:41:58) spectre: and ne'er the twain shall meet

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 24 July 2011
[edit] added: 24 July 2011

(17:24:59) ragib: in fact, I'm bangladeshi

(17:26:53) zfe: are there still tigers there?

(17:34:52) ragib: yes, the royal bengal tiger :D

(17:37:25) zfe: cool

(17:42:24) zfe: can you privately own one

(17:42:28) zfe: in bangladesh?

...

(17:45:47) ragib: zfe, no i guess

(17:46:16) zfe: :(

(17:46:21) zfe: i wanted to be like scarface

(17:46:23) zfe: in bangladesh

(17:46:24) zfe: my villa

(17:46:27) zfe: my tiger

(17:46:27) ragib: oh

(17:46:29) zfe: my cocaine addict wife

(17:46:31) zfe: :(

(17:46:46) firespeaker: zfe: first you have to join the mafia though

(17:46:57) firespeaker: ... *be* the mafia

(17:46:59) ragib: hm

(17:47:18) zfe: "be" is more proper

(17:47:30) firespeaker: I suspect if you were that rich, you probably could own a tiger

(17:47:47) TinoDidriksen: Legally, only if you build a zoo.

(17:47:50) firespeaker: whatever laws exist could be avoided by payments to the right officials

(17:48:01) firespeaker: TinoDidriksen: I'm not talking legally

(17:48:08) firespeaker: TinoDidriksen: this is Bangladesh we're talking about

(17:48:19) TinoDidriksen: True true

(17:48:23) zfe: well, buying a zoo license

(17:48:30) zfe: is not that expensive probably

(17:48:41) firespeaker: zfe: but there would probably be restrictions associated with it

(17:48:46) firespeaker: like letting people in to see your tiger

(17:48:52) zfe: sure

(17:48:58) zfe: but who told you i will keep the tiger in a cage?

(17:49:14) zfe: food for tiger √

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 24 July 2011
[edit] added: 24 July 2011

(18:05:32) zfe: also tomorrow i'm getting on a boat

(18:05:38) zfe: and a turk will be driving

(18:05:43) zfe: which feels extremely wrong

(18:05:56) zfe: like i get invited by spectie and he cooks me spaghetti

(18:06:13) zfe: or i don't know, vietnam invading usa

(18:06:19) zfe: it really looks upside down

(18:06:27) zfe: a turk and an italian on a boat

(18:06:30) zfe: and the turk is driving

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 20 June 2011
[edit] added: 20 June 2011

(05:56:07) zfe: Turk dil kurumu

(05:56:22) zfe: the national association for screwing up turkish

(05:56:30) zfe: i can see their building from my window

(05:56:34) zfe: and every day i spend 20-30mins

(05:56:46) zfe: thinking how i could drive a boing 737

(05:56:49) zfe: in their offices

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 March 2011
[edit] added: 10 March 2011

"I touch things and their technological valence goes back a decade. Like one time, I got into a tractor and it turned into a plough. I make Priuses disappear."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 February 2011
[edit] added: 10 February 2011

"What we need is a friendly rogue nation."

CB in reference to copyright and publishing
politics, books, bad-ideas
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 31 January 2011
[edit] added: 31 January 2011

"I think hung over driving, while not as dangerous as drunk driving, is probably at least as non-productive. The other day I sat at stop sign through two songs waiting for it to turn green."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 13 January 2011
[edit] added: 16 January 2011

CB: "There's one rule about language comparison—"

Niko: "Don't trust a Russian?"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 January 2010
[edit] added: 18 January 2010

(23:37:02) Sarah: Is it bad that I want to take parts of Anne Rice's erotica, copy and paste it into a note on my Facebook, and tag my extremely conservative friends?

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 6 December 2009
[edit] added: 6 December 2009

(15:15:10) Өвгөнхүү: it'll b jank, but desperate times call for duct tape snakes

Öwgönxüü needed a snake
ghetto-talk, bad-ideas, geekiness, imagination
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 14 September 2009
[edit] added: 14 September 2009

Jonathan: "Dude, I have a girlfriend."

Sod: "Yeah, but still."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 26 February 2009
[edit] added: 26 February 2009

(20:47:07) Michael T: well every dictionary needs a little chuvash

(20:47:08) Michael T: that's a feature

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 16 December 2008
[edit] added: 16 December 2008

(17:35:25) Michael T: i wonder if you can make eggnog from mayo

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 October 2008
[edit] added: 18 October 2008

(21:58:30) Hannah: dude, i get nutrition. not when i eat mac&cheese, though :P

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 29 September 2008
[edit] added: 29 September 2008

Jonathan: "I mean, in Kazakhstan a cellphone is like a toothbrush, but in America, it's more like a bicycle."

Michael: "I donno, I knew some people in Kazakhstan who didn't brush their teeth, but you can bet they had a phone."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 August 2008
[edit] added: 23 August 2008

"Do you know what I would've done to have a digging tool that went this deep when I was a kid?"

while watching my father use a hand auger
science, destruction, bad-ideas
[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 22 July 2008
[edit] added: 22 July 2008

(13:28:05) Brenda: can i be a subject? i promise i have a highly unique dialect in Kyrgyz

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 25 June 2008
[edit] added: 25 June 2008

(13:21:56) kesuari: i am not sure if i am nervous, excited or simply feeling the effects of a can of coke i drank so i would be unsure if i was nervous, excited or simply feeling the effects of a can of coke

(13:22:24) kesuari: i second-guess myself all the time

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 17 June 2008
[edit] added: 17 June 2008

(22:10:45) Sarah: Ha, I dye my hair pink and Becca calls going,"Come up to Learning Tech and apply to teach Spanish!"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 16 June 2008
[edit] added: 16 June 2008

(12:25:11) kesuari: living in the sun for billions of years after the earth has been destroyed and human life is extinguished would be pretty dodgy

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 16 June 2008
[edit] added: 16 June 2008

(12:27:16) kesuari: so i'm perfectly content to live for, say, a million years and call it a day

(12:27:38) kesuari: hopefully i can contribute enough genetic code to the human race over that time that future generations are still backwards compatible

(12:27:50) kesuari: i've thought about this too much too

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 9 June 2008
[edit] added: 9 June 2008

(18:14:29) Aladnsane: a cubic litre? Litre is a measurement of volume; at best, a cubic litre would be a round about way of saying litre per cubic... something? ;)

(18:14:54) [me]: no, a cubic litre is a five-dimensional measurement I made up :-P

(18:15:30) Aladnsane: whoa man, 5 dimensional alcohol quantities? now THAT is how you get messed up.

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 6 June 2008
[edit] added: 5 June 2008

(04:01:06) Aladnsane: *shrug* Go to a college bar. Throw a rock. Whoever shouts 'ouch' is 10:1 to have an IQ between... 10 and 1.

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 15 May 2008
[edit] added: 15 May 2008

(19:13:11) kesuari: well, i suppose they say one way to become a great artist is to copy everyone else

(19:13:26) kesuari: well, copy the great artists i mean

(19:13:37) kesuari: someone who wanted to paint well shouldn't copy any drawings i've done

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 19 April 2008
[edit] added: 19 April 2008

To celebrate passover, i tried to make bread. Guess what? It didn't rise.

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 11 April 2008
[edit] added: 10 April 2008

(11:18:41) kesuari: there's a corner of hell where people write Microsoft Office-style suites in TeX

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 27 March 2008
[edit] added: 26 March 2008

"Well, it's like a protein bar."

you don't want to know...
bad-ideas, food, badness
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 26 March 2008
[edit] added: 26 March 2008

(23:13:38) Colum: that friend of mine kept saying that "they are trying. English isn't their first language!" But you don't try it on your merchandise!

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 March 2008
[edit] added: 19 March 2008

мен: "Таңга чейин чай иче алам."

Тралик: "Давай спор!"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 March 2008
[edit] added: 19 March 2008

Тралик: "Чай ичесиңби?"

мен: "Уф, жок, болдум."

Тралик: "Давай, паслений стакан."

мен: "Макул. Элүү грам."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 27 February 2008
[edit] added: 27 February 2008

(18:28:09) Jóhann: I sent such a corny email "What will it cost if someone stole this book" :P haha

(18:28:15) Jóhann: yeah, who the fuck is going to steal a book haha

considering cheating the library out of a book..
sadness, bad-ideas, money, stupidity, sadness
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 14 February 2008
[edit] added: 14 February 2008

(23:10:36) Jóhann: no thong?

(23:10:39) [me]: no

(23:10:54) [me]: but at the bazaar right next to the cards at one place they had a big pile of women's underwear

(23:11:04) [me]: probably including thongs; I didn't check

(23:11:10) Jóhann: im glad you didnt check

(23:11:42) [me]: why?

...

(23:13:44) Jóhann: because thats just perfectly normal for a guy who looks straight with red hair to go through a pile of women's underwear in a middle of an unorderly marketplace in Kyrgryzstan...nothing strange about that

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 13 February 2008
[edit] added: 13 February 2008

(16:32:42) Jóhann: thank you so much for your referal !

(16:32:52) Jóhann: if i was there and gay, id give you a big kiss :D

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 13 February 2008
[edit] added: 14 February 2008

(17:54:49) Brenda: a card is better than a red satin thong. i like you. you have class

...

(17:55:26) [me]: anyway, try giving a Central Asian girl a thong and see what happens

(17:55:40) [me]: actually, I'm not sure what would happen

(17:55:57) Brenda: she would floss with it

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 11 February 2008
[edit] added: 12 February 2008

(00:15:30) Michael: i don't know what wp is

(00:15:47) Michael: ohh

(00:15:50) Michael: wikipedia

(00:16:21) Michael: i was like, word perfect? why would anyone rely on that. it's so 199-never

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 24 December 2007
[edit] added: 24 December 2007

Jonathan: "Well, I mean, if you own land, and the value goes down, that's something you worry about, and you look to the cause."

Mandy: "Yeah, 'cause black people themselves actually make property values go down, just by standing there. Why don't we just shoot them all."

Jonathan: "Well, I'm not disagreeing with you guys—"

everyone: [jaws drop]

Jonathan: "Nono, that's not what I mean!"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 21 December 2007
[edit] added: 21 December 2007

(15:15:12) [anon1]: no CIA for you. better finish the PhD

(15:15:27) [anon2]: why do you keep denying me the government jobs?

(15:15:35) [anon2]: they must have a pretty interesting file on me already

(15:16:16) [anon1]: on me too i would imagine

(15:16:48) [anon1]: if we ever applied we would fail the background check -- they wouldn't have the energy to complete it! :)

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 20 December 2007
[edit] added: 20 December 2007

(14:49:24) Brenda: it isn't that i don't care about consequences! i just usually don't think about them

(14:49:42) [me]: it seems to me more that you do think about them, you just honestly don't care about them

(14:49:54) Brenda: ok you're right

(14:49:57) Brenda: i don't

(14:50:12) Brenda: it's after i decide i don't care that i stop thinking about them

(14:50:26) Brenda: that way it can be a surprise when they happen! :)

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 19 December 2007
[edit] added: 19 December 2007

(02:17:23) Aaron B: i wish i was the sky god

(02:17:32) Aaron B: i'd get tenure real fast

(02:17:45) Aaron B: "it says here on your CV that you're the Sky God?"

(02:17:49) Aaron B: "yeah, that's correct"

(02:17:53) Aaron B: BAM

(02:17:57) Aaron B: Tenure

Aaron's not even eligible for tenure, because he's a *grad student*
academia, college, bad-ideas, religion, time-travel, stupidity
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 17 December 2007
[edit] added: 18 December 2007

"Yeah, it's like a bonus—if you've got hair that's fuzzy or warm, you should get that haircut, you know?"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 8 December 2007
[edit] added: 7 December 2007

(13:21:23) Brenda: don't listen to people in love!!! they always give bad advice

(13:21:42) Brenda: their brains go into deep freeze

(13:21:57) Brenda: it's like, tengri all over the frontal lobe, if you know what i mean

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 27 November 2007
[edit] added: 27 November 2007

(06:20:41) kesuari: hang it on an article of clothing, hang that on the line near the tree, it'll be gone by tomorrow

suggestions for how to get rid of a spider
animals
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 9 November 2007
[edit] added: 12 November 2007

me: "Do you know any numbers for a taxi to Karakol?"

all: "Taxi? Take a marshrutka. They're cheap and fast."

me: "Aren't taxis faster?"

Leo: "Yeah, but do you really want to go that fast?"

[comment] [rate] 5/5


[link] heard: 3 November 2007
[edit] added: 3 November 2007

Tristan: "You should get that [dripping sink] fixed. And when the plumber comes, you should get him to fix the hot tap [in the bathroom] too."

Jonathan: "Yeah, maybe I'll call my landlord."

Tristan: "But he'll probably come and try to fix it himself."

Jonathan: "What gives you that impression?"

Tristan: "Just the over-hereness of this sort of place."

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 31 October 2007
[edit] added: 31 October 2007

"I don't think they issue ethics approval based on whether it's more ethical than things that're more fun."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 26 October 2007
[edit] added: 26 October 2007

"I think back in Soviet times, the brake must've been on the steering wheel or something."

[comment] [rate] 5/5


[link] heard: 5 September 2007
[edit] added: 5 September 2007

"You guys had lots of things growing up that other people had never heard of, like broccoli cookies."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 1 August 2007
[edit] added: 1 August 2007

(03:42:49) kesuari: nothing backs up like chiselling a great big stone

(03:43:57) kesuari: i sometimes reckon i should do that: go carving runes somewhere in the bush

(03:44:55) kesuari: not runes per se; i mean some form of phonetic alphabet that looks like runes and is similar enough to the latin alphabet or germanic runes to be decryptable

(03:45:17) kesuari: or maybe i'll do it a bit less phonetic just to give the future linguists a bit of fun

(03:45:43) kesuari: can't be too trivial or else i'll be the Orrm of the 21st century

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 12 July 2007
[edit] added: 12 July 2007

Derek: "I think we should write in runes, and the British should write in Roman."

Jonathan: "What about the Australians?"

Derek: "… They can write in kanji."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 26 June 2007
[edit] added: 26 June 2007

"I hate the 4th of July—I'm always afraid someone will burn down my apartment. I have terrible neighbours. Not in my building, but within bottle-rocket distance."

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 24 June 2007
[edit] added: 24 June 2007

(04:44:13) [me]: nz has more sheep/km² than china has people

(04:44:20) kesuari: indeed

(04:44:48) kesuari: this is the basis for why the chinese, in general, breed with other chinese; but new zealanders often breed with sheep.

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 24 June 2007
[edit] added: 24 June 2007

(04:02:04) [me]: let's do sheep based on land area now

(04:02:43) [me]: Kazakhstan: 15'217'700 / 2,724,900 km²

(04:03:06) [me]: Kyrgyzstan: 5'264'000 / 199,900 km²

(04:03:11) [me]: oops

(04:03:16) [me]: I think I'm doing humans :-P

(04:03:52) kesuari: unless you're kiwi, that's what I'd expect you to "do"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 29 May 2007
[edit] added: 29 May 2007

"‘Venus’ and ‘venerial’ are related. Venus is the Goddess of love, and venerial diseases happen when you're looking for love in the wrong places."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 7 May 2007
[edit] added: 7 May 2007

"Well I'm gonna go watch atomic bombs. …Dude, they're pretty—it's too bad they suck."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 30 April 2007
[edit] added: 30 April 2007

(03:59:35) kesuari: how many ways does greek have of writing /i/!

(03:59:53) kesuari: it’s like the saw english "ough" and thought "hey, we can do that ... in reverse"

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 25 April 2007
[edit] added: 25 April 2007

Joyce: "Now I'm really sorry for referring that woman to the Tlingit wikipedia article. It makes it sound terrifying."

Jonathan: "Why's it terrifying?"

Amy: "Because she's not a linguist, and every ejective possible doesn't sound like a good thing."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 19 April 2007
[edit] added: 23 April 2007

"Do not put your baby in front of my car."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 April 2007
[edit] added: 18 April 2007

Shyngys: "This is the first time I'm showing up late to this class, so it's okay."

Jonathan: "Yeah, but it was because of music."

Shyngys: "But it was Kazakh music, so it was worth it."

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 15 April 2007
[edit] added: 15 April 2007

me, holding a can of Mountain Dew: "You know what would probably be good? This and orange juice."

Derek: "I donno man...."

me: "I mean it's green and orange—how can you go wrong with… oh, wait."

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 13 April 2007
[edit] added: 13 April 2007

"But how will you know how to drive drunk unless you practice?"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 5 April 2007
[edit] added: 5 April 2007

(00:42:03) Derek: I found a way to explain language change to our students

(00:42:31) Derek: Languages start out cool and get less cool with time, unless the change involves gaining velars or uvulars

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 21 March 2007
[edit] added: 21 March 2007

(05:34:00) kesuari: yeah. i get really bored when i’ve nothing to do; i simply can’t procrastinate from *nothing*

(05:34:13) kesuari: soon as you give me work, then *bamn* i’m not doing it

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 19 March 2007
[edit] added: 21 March 2007

"Like, when I smoke in a public place, it's a private public place."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 19 March 2007
[edit] added: 19 March 2007

(03:14) cassowary: when the nouveau drivers are released, and i can get video out happening, i’ll plug my MS mouse back into my imac, and have an imac with a dell screen, a sun keyboard, and a microsoft mouse running linux. that will be fun :)

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 February 2007
[edit] added: 19 February 2007

"Let me tell you, Chuck-for-the-buck is the best."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 February 2007
[edit] added: 11 February 2007

"Can you imagine going to the dentist and they're like ‘Our regular drill is broken today, so we're using a corkscrew instead’?"

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 23 January 2007
[edit] added: 23 January 2007

(23:14:08) [Sarah]: Yeah...I can see me in Poland...I'll have to remember not to go out and get drunk.

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 15 January 2007
[edit] added: 15 January 2007

(19:48:35) [Aladnsane]: Kosher slaughter generally seems a good idea to me. Simple. Effective. Not Traif.

[comment] [rate] 1/5


[link] heard: 12 January 2007
[edit] added: 13 January 2007

"His father's like ‘Don't fly too close to the sun Icharus.’ And he's like ‘This freakin' rocks! Woohoo!’"

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 12 January 2007
[edit] added: 13 January 2007

Meghan: "People used to throw batteries at me because they thought I was gay."

Julia: "And they thought you needed the batteries why?"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 January 2007
[edit] added: 16 January 2007

"So if you thought the answer was something other than two, and didn't say it because everyone else said ‘two’, that was probably a good idea."

[comment] [rate] 2/5


[link] heard: 3 January 2007
[edit] added: 9 January 2007

(03:28:52) [me]: mkay, yeah, I need to pack

(03:29:03) Derek: psh

(03:29:04) Derek: whatever

(03:29:10) Derek: just throw it all in a ball

(03:29:14) Derek: duct tape it up

(03:29:19) Derek: and roll it on the plane

(03:29:30) Derek: if you tell them its a bomb, they work faster you know

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 30 December 2006
[edit] added: 9 January 2007

my mother: "Did you put all your candy in a bag?"

me: "Nah, I just took some wrapping paper and put it all in there."

my mother: "But it's not a bag..."

me: "It's taped together though."

my mother: "But I taped it..."

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 9 November 2006
[edit] added: 9 November 2006

"She was small enough to fit in my backpack, but I don't know if I could've gotten her through customs."

Doug met a five year old in Kyrgyzstan that he wanted to take home.
bad-ideas, sketchiness, SSSR, kyrgyz
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 9 October 2006
[edit] added: 9 October 2006

"Okay, be careful when you're going to the bathroom, cause we don't want toilet paper falling in the toilet."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 1 September 2006
[edit] added: 1 September 2006

18:14:37 kesuari: ummm. they have a holiday on the first day of classes?

18:14:56 kesuari: how can you have a day of classes on a holiday?

18:15:11 kesuari: isn’t that like going to work to celebrate a day off?

18:15:46 kesuari: soviets are weird.

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 7 June 2006
[edit] added: 7 June 2006

"Are you sure we should be, like, mining for nuts in the ice-cream tub?"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 5 June 2006
[edit] added: 6 June 2006

"Basically, if you can read a double entendre into it, do it. No pun intended."

giving advice for how to read Shakespearean comedy
puns, books, bad-ideas, hormone-driven, euphamisms, language, wisdom
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 27 May 2006
[edit] added: 27 May 2006

"Everybody does that to salads. It makes them look like they're bleeding."

about tomatoes
death, bad-ideas, evil, badness
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 22 May 2006
[edit] added: 22 May 2006

"I had this wack dream where somehow we acquired a Soviet starship."

[comment] [rate] 4.5/5


[link] heard: 11 May 2006
[edit] added: 11 May 2006

"IHOP serves shit, not breakfast. However, it is becoming increasingly tempting."

at 4-something-bad-o-clock
food, badness, sketchiness, bad-ideas, computers, linux
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 8 May 2006
[edit] added: 9 May 2006
"So me and my brother were considering how easy it'd be to steal the Rosetta stone. Unfortunately, it's really trackable. But it'd be cool to, like, have the Rosetta stone in your basement, and no one would know but you."
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 4 May 2006
[edit] added: 4 May 2006

"Maybe you should implement the medieval system, where if one of the grad students misbehaves, they whip one of the undergrads."

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 23 April 2006
[edit] added: 23 April 2006

I'll spare you my escapades of sleep-deprived monitor/keyboard plugging-in (let's just say it was like Who's On First), but:

in an e-mail to cog-servers, which was about as would be expected with that introduction
sleep, bad-ideas, technology, sadness, analogies
[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 21 April 2006
[edit] added: 21 April 2006

"This tastes like melted lollipops."

about Manischewitz
food, bad-ideas, religion, analogies
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 31 March 2006
[edit] added: 31 March 2006

06:23:30 [Laura]: I keep trying to glue the glasses back together, but superglue won't hold them.

06:25:39 [Laura]: i've tried twice, and i'll i've managed to do is glue everything to everything else that i don't want glued.

06:25:48 [Laura]: Like my hand to my mouse. That wasn't fun.

06:26:30 [Laura]: never get super glue on your fingers, and then click on your mouse.

[comment] [rate] 5/5


[link] heard: 27 February 2006
[edit] added: 27 February 2006

19:14:50 [Laura]: then pay 15 bucks for a cheap haircut, and have them save the hair.

19:15:01 [Laura]: You can braid it and put it on your wall.

19:15:07 [Laura]: That would be really creepy.

19:15:09 [Laura]: Don't do that.

19:15:24 [Laura]: mail it to people.

[comment] [rate] 3.5/5


[link] heard: 7 February 2006
[edit] added: 7 February 2006

21:08:53 [me]: well, I thought "file has vanished" was an interesting way of informing me of it

21:09:09 [oberon]: Well, as far as rsync was concerned, that's what happened

21:09:20 [oberon]: one minute there's a file, the next minute there's not a file

21:09:43 [me]: yeah

21:09:49 [me]: I suppose that could be called vanishing

21:09:51 [oberon]: Would you prefer "file has committed glorious harikari, and will ride the divine wind to its 70 virgins"?

21:11:07 [me]: heh

21:11:08 [me]: yes

21:11:44 [oberon]: So go edit the rsync source =P

21:11:50 [oberon]: or even the binary

21:11:54 [oberon]: just ask grep...

21:12:21 [me]: nah

21:12:28 [me]: I already don't trust rsync

21:12:31 [oberon]: lol

21:12:32 [me]: not going to screw with its binary

21:17:27 [oberon]: Am I the only one who thinks that 70 number is kinda arbitrary?

21:17:33 [oberon]: I've always sorta wondered about that

21:17:43 [oberon]: I mean, it's not like they're all useful at once

21:18:07 [oberon]: The sort of thing you do with virgins is not something you can do with 70 without engineered infrastructure and supports

21:18:37 [oberon]: Is the next verse of the Qu'aran something about "and you will also receive a house so large, it requires 65 people to keep it clean?"

21:31:26 [oberon]: That's still counting on an awful lot of women to die virgins

21:31:34 [oberon]: And I don't think infant mortality counts here

21:34:05 [oberon]: Maybe 70 is just an average

21:34:09 [oberon]: and it's really determined by annual ratios

21:34:47 [oberon]: so, like, if you have a string of really unsexy years, 'cause the plague hits or the 70s happen or something, you get more virgins, so everyone gets 71.2 or something

21:35:47 [oberon]: So it's more like "I got 70 virgins*" and then in fine print: "*results not typical. Actual results may vary. Consult your doctor before..."

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 25 August 2005
[edit] added: 26 August 2005

me: "How far back is his Cornish ancestry?"

my father: "Five or six generations."

me: "So he's got a lot of other stuff mixed in then?"

my father: "I wouldn't count on it."

me: "How inbred is he?!"

Hannah: "That's how he got that colour hair."

in reference to one of my father's colleagues
bad-ideas, hair, sex, southernisms
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 22 August 2005
[edit] added: 22 August 2005

"If we could put the bathroom out in the carport, we wouldʼve done it a long time ago."

[comment] [rate] 5/5


[link] heard: 14 May 2005
[edit] added: 4 July 2005

"Worf, you're a Klingon. What's a little genocide in the name of self defense?"

Garak, on Star Trek DS9 - Broken Link
war, sketchiness, cardassianisms, bad-ideas
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 17 April 2005
[edit] added: 4 July 2005

"Laura, no fucking fire."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 14 March 2005
[edit] added: 14 March 2005

(05:04:45) Jess: no one's as bad as you

(05:04:58) [me]: yeah, I think I might even hold records

(05:05:13) [me]: one paper due in february turned in the day grades were due in may

(05:05:29) [me]: another final paper turned in early the next semester

(05:06:06) Jess: yep

(05:06:15) Jess: you get the procrastinator award

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 13 March 2005
[edit] added: 13 March 2005

Jonathan: "That's a lot of rice."

Matt: "Yeah.."

Jonathan: "So I'll put a lot of corn on it."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 March 2005
[edit] added: 11 March 2005

"Dem totns gelt. I'd like to get my hands on dem totns gelt, yo?"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 9 March 2005
[edit] added: 11 March 2005

Jackendoff: "Somebody washed [the board] with something wrong."

McIntosh: "Well, I wanna wash it with them."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 2 March 2005
[edit] added: 2 March 2005

"Guys, I have a get rich slow scheme. Okay, owning a cellar is a lot cheaper than owning a vinyard..."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 27 February 2005
[edit] added: 27 February 2005

Jonathan: "Чё готовишь? [What're you making?]"

Vickie: "Cauliflower."

Jonathan: "С яйцами? [With eggs?]"

Vickie: "Yep."

Jonathan: "И с флафом?! [And with marshmallow fluff?!]"

Vickie: "Yep. And with paprika and Tony's."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 15 January 2005
[edit] added: 15 January 2005

(01:26:33) Aaron B: let's focus here

(01:26:38) Aaron B: ihop

(01:26:43) Aaron B: we need to get a car

(01:26:56) Jonor Thwash: we could steal and hotwire one?

(01:27:09) Aaron B: yes!

(01:27:11) Aaron B: oh wait

(01:27:14) Aaron B: that's a "bad" idea

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 22 November 2004
[edit] added: 22 November 2004

"Why would I want to be in a commercial? I mean, I could run around naked on the roof of Ziv and say 'Hey, look, I'm that guy in the police logs,' but that also has no appeal."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 14 November 2004
[edit] added: 14 November 2004

Vickie: "Vickie am hungry."

oberon: "Vickie am go in closet."

oberon shoves Vickie into our pantry
orcish, bad-ideas
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 November 2004
[edit] added: 10 November 2004

(08:34:57) Laura C: I accidently lit my pencil on fire

(08:35:03) Laura C: And now it won't work.

(08:36:52) [me]: what kind of pencil

(08:37:05) Laura C: mechanical.

(08:37:20) Laura C: I wanted to see what happened if you lit the lead on fire.

(08:37:29) Laura C: except i caught the plastic on fire

(08:37:39) Laura C: and the top part kinda melted off.

(08:38:46) Laura C: And the peice of lead is completley covered in melted plastic.

(08:39:13) Laura C: BUT I CAN STILL WRITE WITH IT!

(08:39:33) [me]: I thought you said it didn't work?

(08:39:51) Laura C: Well, the tip of the piece of lead pokes through the plastic

(08:39:57) Laura C: So i can technically still write with it

(08:40:28) Laura C: But it's not like i can reverse the damage i did. When that peice of lead is through, it'll be completley broken.

(08:47:54) Laura C: this is the coolest pencil EVER

(08:48:56) Laura C: It's now more like an abstract art idea of a pencil

(08:50:30) Laura C: It's all twisted and seperated

[Jonathan continues to add quote to quotes page]

(08:50:51) Laura C: DAMNIT, You're making me seem like an insane crazy pyro who always burns shit at 8 in the morning.

(08:52:00) [me]: well...

(08:52:20) Laura C: shhh

Laura, rambling about setting her pencil on fire for a good 20 minutes
school, stupidity, bad-ideas, quotes, burning, diatribes, typical-conversations
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 9 November 2004
[edit] added: 9 November 2004

Peter: "Did you know they sell birthday candles at the C-store?"

Jonathan: "Yeah, I think I saw that."

Peter: "... Wanna light some?"

[Peter fiddles with a box of candles he pulled out of pocket]

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 9 November 2004
[edit] added: 9 November 2004

"The throbbing in your heart? It doesn't go there..."

in reference to Great 6 (GTO)
love, scariness, bad-ideas, tv
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 8 November 2004
[edit] added: 8 November 2004

Nat: "Look at the specs; it turns out that a lot of the examples out there are wrong. I had a lot of trouble until I checked the specs."

Jonathan: "Well, I looked at your code."

Nat: "Don't look at my code—I looked at your code!"

[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 7 November 2004
[edit] added: 7 November 2004

Jonathan: "You know what? Actually, I could just give you an account on my box, you could ssh in, run vmware via X-forwarding, and---"

Nat: "Uhm, Jonathan, that sounds like one of the slowest ideas for computing ever. Plus it'd be over encrypted wireless, which adds even more layers."

Nat and Jonathan, while talking to oberon
computers
[comment] [rate] 5/5


[link] heard: 31 October 2004
[edit] added: 31 October 2004

"Vicke, whoring out your boyfriend for your own amusement is not a good idea."

oberon, to Vickie, in reference to Nat and Jonathan (don't ask)
scariness, sexuality, sex
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 29 September 2004
[edit] added: 29 September 2004

"We have a problem with marijuana in this building, mostly down at that end, but if you know anything about it, please tell me. Even if you're doing it and I don't notice, but you know someone else who is, rat them out."

my CA (Community Advisor)
brandeis, bad-ideas
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 5 May 2004
[edit] added: 5 May 2004

Kesuari: no law against oberon having good ideas. and even if there were, it's a good law to disobey once in a while.

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 5 May 2004
[edit] added: 5 May 2004

[oberon eats cheddar goldfish with chocolate frosting (with real butter)]

"This is making me sick."

[comment] [rate] 4/5


[link] heard: 12 April 2004
[edit] added: 13 April 2004

"Let's google Lemur noises."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 23 February 2004
[edit] added: 14 March 2004

"No, you don't need Word Perfect 6...No, you don't need 5.1 either!"

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 23 February 2004
[edit] added: 14 March 2004

"No, you can't transfer files from the ColecoVision Adam anymore."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 12 February 2004
[edit] added: 12 February 2004

"There are certain parts of my body I can't balance a book on."

uhm, yeah....
bad-ideas, sexuality
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 26 January 2004
[edit] added: 26 January 2004

"My mittens I can totally type with them on"

Aaron learns about the north
computers, weather, bad-ideas, typos, linguistics
[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 14 January 2004
[edit] added: 14 January 2004

(17:51:53) Aarón: that would be an interesting study

(17:51:58) Aarón: how sarcasm is denoted in text

(17:54:20) Aarón: how many weeks are there in the semester?

Aaron loses his mind
language, bad-ideas, insanity, time, sarcasm
[comment] [rate] 3/5


[link] heard: 16 December 2003
[edit] added: 17 December 2003

Jonathan: "That peppermint ice cream would probably be good with some of those mint hershey's kisses melted and dribbled on top."

Hannah: "Ugh.. ... Mmmm...."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 21 November 2003
[edit] added: 22 November 2003

"Well, you can actually navigate the steam pipes I'm told. You just have to figure out when which ones fire—No, I'm serious; people have done this."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 5 November 2003
[edit] added: 6 November 2003

Peter, rummaging through the food drawer at work: "Ooh, coffee beans. Those will keep me awake in class. Do you think they're caffeinated?"

me: " ... Probably. I mean, why would Dave have coffee in the office if it weren't caffeinated?"

Peter: "How many do I need?"

me, Adam: [laughter] "Uhm, Peter...."

Peter: [humbled voice] "I'm serious."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 3 September 2003
[edit] added: 20 October 2003

"Mm. Chicken-fried doughnut."

[comment] [rate] 2/5


[link] heard: 30 August 2003
[edit] added: 30 August 2003

[Kathryn is vegan]

Laura: "I should spray some squirt cheese at you. We could fill a watergun with it."

Kathryn: "I'm sorry, I don't think that has any dairy products at all in it."

Jonathan: "You could always melt a block of cheddar and put that in a watergun."

Laura: "But then it would get hard."

Kathryn: "And that would destroy the watergun."

&c.

while eating cheeseless pizza at Cappy's
weirdness, bad-ideas
[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 11 August 2003
[edit] added: 19 August 2003

"That ad is a nightmare—I can't imagine quilting toilet-paper for a living."

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 18 June 2003
[edit] added: 18 June 2003

(02:54:29) [Shreyas]: i better eat soon

(02:54:36) [Shreyas]: i'm trying to reset my sleep cycle

(02:55:03) [me]: I should sleep soon, myself

(02:55:14) [me]: I didn't get enough sleep last night so napped today

(02:55:16) [me]: big mistake

(02:55:19) [me]: now I'm wide awake

(02:55:28) [me]: and have class in 5 and a half hours

(02:55:38) [me]: well, not *wide* awake

(02:55:46) [Shreyas]: crazy

(02:55:53) [me]: I had a tired spell around 12:30 when my sugar crashed from snacking on fig bars

(02:55:56) [Shreyas]: yeah, you should sleep

(02:56:07) [Shreyas]: that's probably a way to do it

(02:56:15) [Shreyas]: you could sugar crash again

(02:56:19) [Shreyas]: and sleep then

(02:56:24) [me]: I'm out of fig bars

(02:56:32) [Shreyas]: maple syrup?

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 10 June 2003
[edit] added: 10 June 2003

(23:19:24) oberon: BTW, speaking of Gentoo -- portage is coming to OSX!

(23:19:43) firespeaker: so you're going to be running portage + apt on OSX?

(23:19:49) oberon: no

(23:19:54) oberon: portage + apt + darwinports

(23:20:17) oberon: Yeah, if you wanna see a stable OSX box...find someone else's =P

(23:20:26) oberon: Oh, let's not forget all the libs I custom-compile.

(23:20:39) oberon: It's Debia-Gent-Mac O-Slackware!

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: 5 June 2003
[edit] added: 5 June 2003

(17:12:07) [me]: I have a new haircut too, but it's pretty normal for me. just shorter than most people are used to

(17:13:40) [Sarah]: lol. the jonathan. i think we should market it that way

[comment] [rate] no rating


[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"I'm not writing it from a user's standpoint; I'm writing it from an author's standpoint."

[comment] [rate] no rating




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by Jonathan North Washington
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