firespeaker.org

Jonathan: "Пиво тебе понравилось?"

Толгонай: "Вкус как лимонад. Имено лимонный лимонад. Классно - первое пиво которое мне понравилось."

"Okay, here's one of my stories about moonshine. So I have this uncle named Sam, and he's married to a French woman..."

Тралик: "Чай ичесиңби?"

мен: "Уф, жок, болдум."

Тралик: "Давай, паслений стакан."

мен: "Макул. Элүү грам."

"‘Stop hugging strange men and sit down.’ … Oh, that's actually what's happening."

[band plays rock song]

Natalie: "It's really talking to my heart."

Katy: "The beer?"

Jonathan: "Well, alcohol leads to bad judgement; beer takes a little while."

Lara: "Well, maybe for you; for me, it's like three sips, and then… you know, bad judgement. Not really bad, though."

"It [the bottle of vodka] is not a microphone. Drink."

"You know, I've drunk more in the last two weeks than .. in the last three."

"There's something about mountain people and alcohol—you know, they're not strangers."

"You don't know Central Asia if you think eating trumps toasts."

Thatcher: "So what was that half-hour-long toast about?"

Tamunia: "It's about love; it doesn't translate into English."

"There's almost as many crows as there was percent alcohol in that beer."

"I can just see Thomas Jefferson and Ben Franklin sitting down over a glass of Sam Adams."

"I'm going to be in the art building tomorrow at noon, with beer, rocks, and paint."

"But how will you know how to drive drunk unless you practice?"

"I don't like to pee—it's just something I have to do a lot."

"Let me tell you, Chuck-for-the-buck is the best."

Jonathan: "That's what weekends are for: taking care of stuff that got out of hand during the week."

Rianna: "Yeah, like sobriety."

Doug: "Cause after 2 beers, I'm starting to feel it. I don't get mean; I just get gay and happy—or maybe ‘gay’ isn't the right word."

Shoshana: "No, you definitely do not get gay."

"Formatting in LaTeX is like spending the extra couple of bucks to have a good liquor in your cocktail."

"Bartending in America is just making a lot of blowjobs and sex on the beach for sorority girls. If you don't have standards and you don't have a fear of venereal diseases, then bartending in America can be a good way to get a lot of blowjobs and sex on the beach from sorority girls. However, I have standards and a fear of venereal diseases."

"Parks are good for stuff like drinking. …And kissing."

Jonathan: "I think I spilled margarita on my laptop."

Aladnsane: "…Dude, you're licking your laptop!"

Jonathan: "But it's sour. Wait, this could be battery acid. That would be bad."

Aladnsane: "Don't tip this. There's a beverage involved."

Jonathan: "But I like tipping things with beverages involved… like cows."

"This tastes like melted lollipops."

Leyzer: "I should drop International Relations and take Georgian."

me: "The Georgian language is like international relations."

Shoshana: "Georgian wine maybe…"

Leslie: "[In Central Asia], at least as a girl they don't make you drink."

Chay: "Go to Kyrgyzstan."

Shawn: "He's so gay. He must spend at least 3 hours on his moustache alone in the morning!"

Michaela: "Oh, come on–you know you like girls who do that."

"What kind of listen do you guys music to?"

"Guys, I have a get rich slow scheme. Okay, owning a cellar is a lot cheaper than owning a vinyard..."

"I was like wait a minute, I can taste the alcohol in this, but then I realised it was the grapefruit."

[discussion about birth control in Kazakhstan]

Jess: "Well, there are always used kvas bottles."

Jonathan [hands Jess a glass bottle]: "Here. You know where to put it. Be my guest."

Ian: "Well, if the condom breaks, you'll know right away."

[Whole room cringes in pain.]

Ian: "Mental note: no glass condoms."

Matt: "Well, there goes my version of Cinderella ."

"I think s'more Schnapps is the best idea ever. Do they make that? Graham cracker liquour?"

"Isn't that what freshman do? Drink, sleep around, and move in herds?"

Jon: "Who left the iced tea pitcher with 2 shots in it?"

Vickie: "Wait, you don't measure iced tea in shots."

Nat & Jonathan simultaneously: "Jon measures everything in shots."

"I don't think I've had enough to drink. I can still type all my passwords."

Vickie: "Yes, you can change positions. Refusing to change your positions just means your pig-headed and stubborn and stupid."

Jonathan: "That makes me sad."

[anon]: "Drink up, Jonathan. That's the leader of the `free world'."

oberon: "Yeah, they're not even allowed to talk to eachother. It's not even a debate, it's a joint press conference."

Matt: "That's why the only appropriate way to respond to the political system in this country is to imbibe alcohol."

"There's nothing that starts with chocolate and rum and ends with balls that's not good."

Jon: "Ooh, we could so make a white Russian."

Jonathan: "With cranberry vodka?"

Vickie: "That would be a gay white Russian. It'd be a rainbow Russian."

oberon wanted to try a brandy-filled chocolate

Greer: "Sorry, you don't get that kind because there's only one left."

Jonathan: "You can have my half if you want."

oberon: "That's okay, a vodka and a lawyer are enough for me."

Jonathan: "Это маленький мир."

Руслан: "Это большая деревня."

Jonathan: "Database."

Руслан: "Я это не понимаю. Derbes, это пиво."

group: "Hey, oberon, try some fake absinthe."

oberon: "But that's fake bad crap. Which of these adjectives are good?"

"Yo ho ho and a bottle of peppermint schnapps."

"I actually went to modfest and got spilled beer on."

Nathan: "Take his keys."

Me: "He's walking home."

Nathan: "Take them anyway; he might drive his house into something."

Me: "What's that thing when you mix orange juice with vodka?"

Hannah: "Suicide?"