"Well, now that you mention it, that does look kinda like orange." [ view | more ]



Interesting things said in my presence

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Category: religion


most quoted re "religion": Jonathan North Washington (24), other (13), David Borenstein (7), oberon (7), Tristan Alexander McLeay (6)

other categories found with "religion": weirdness (16), food (15), politics (12), language (11), philosophy (10)

Viewing 81 of 1466 Result(s)
[ sort: date / rating, ↓ ]

[link] heard: 19 February 2013
[edit] added: 19 February 2013

"Theremin ensemble? That sounds like the definition of Hell."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 9 November 2012
[edit] added: 9 November 2012

(11:51:13) Francis Tyers: do you have christmas lists in america ?

(11:51:42) jonathan: uhm

(11:51:44) jonathan: maybe?

(11:52:00) jonathan: I feel like there's some extra piece of pragmatics attached to what you have in mind

(11:52:49) jonathan: like, a wishlist that you might show your relatives before Christmas?

(11:52:54) Francis Tyers: yeah

(11:52:56) jonathan: yeah, sure

(11:52:59) Francis Tyers: that you hang on a tree

(11:52:59) jonathan: we have that :-P

(11:53:02) jonathan: whoa

(11:53:02) Francis Tyers: for the christmas robin

(11:53:03) jonathan: wait

(11:53:05) Francis Tyers: to collect

(11:53:08) Francis Tyers: the christmas robin

(11:53:12) jonathan: wtf man

(11:53:14) Francis Tyers: takes the list to father christmas

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 3 March 2012
[edit] added: 3 March 2012

"It was framed within Marxist—... I was going to say ‘theology’—which I think I'll stick with."

giving his talk at the ACES conference
religion, mongolian, SSSR, anthropology, philosophy, academia
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 28 January 2012
[edit] added: 1 February 2012



мин: "Бер генә булдымы? .. Юк, сәгать өч икән! Нигә бер генә ди?"


мин: "Аа, ике икән."

[... чаң]

мин: "Өч. Булды."

Ростәм: "Белмим, чиркәүдә дүрт тә булырга мөмкен."

мин: "Нигә?"

Ростәм: "Чиркәү булса, һәр ничек була"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 26 January 2012
[edit] added: 1 February 2012

Андрей: "А почему свинину не кушаешь?"

я: "Моя мама еврейка, и поэтому у нас такая семейная традиция есть."

Андрей: "А мой дед был Удмурт, и поэтому я все кушаю."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 25 October 2011
[edit] added: 25 October 2011

"My family doesn't ever have a ham for Christmas dinner because we're Jewish."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 14 January 2011
[edit] added: 14 January 2011

me: "Do you know ‘Children of a Lesser God’?"

Kris: "Is it a movie about mormons or something?"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 1 November 2010
[edit] added: 1 November 2010

Baatar: "It says here that the republican candidates were going ‘reverse trick-or-treating’."

me: "What does that mean?"

Baatar: "They call it ‘trick-or-campaigning’. But it should be ‘trick and campaigning’."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 18 October 2010
[edit] added: 18 October 2010

[Baatar opens New Testament]

"‘G-d’, ‘G-d’, ‘G-d’, ‘Man’, ..‘Zeus’?!"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 18 January 2010
[edit] added: 18 January 2010

(23:37:02) Sarah: Is it bad that I want to take parts of Anne Rice's erotica, copy and paste it into a note on my Facebook, and tag my extremely conservative friends?

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 31 May 2009
[edit] added: 31 May 2009

"Isn't there a law against shooting people when they're at church?"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 28 May 2009
[edit] added: 28 May 2009

(11:22:14) kesuari: i think it's more that people want to be rich

(11:22:19) kesuari: but not particularly jewish

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 2 June 2008
[edit] added: 2 June 2008

(15:32:55) Aladnsane: Is it spelled with an H in yiddish? I always just guess with German orthography. Hell, it's written in Hebrew half the time *shrug*

(15:33:06) [me]: it's not written in hebrew

(15:33:09) [me]: just hebrew script

(15:33:13) Aladnsane: point

(15:33:33) Aladnsane: At least I didn't say it was written in Jewish :P I get asked if I speak Jewish way more often than is cool.

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 31 May 2008
[edit] added: 30 May 2008

(11:48:40) kesuari: they mean you'll live with god (or notwith god) forever

(11:49:00) kesuari: heh, without means notwith. i didn't need to make the word up

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 19 April 2008
[edit] added: 19 April 2008

To celebrate passover, i tried to make bread. Guess what? It didn't rise.

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 11 April 2008
[edit] added: 10 April 2008

(11:18:41) kesuari: there's a corner of hell where people write Microsoft Office-style suites in TeX

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 19 March 2008
[edit] added: 19 March 2008

(23:29:36) Michael: wow

(23:29:38) Michael: you're so mean dude

(23:29:59) Michael: if heaven was run by carebears

(23:30:02) Michael: there's no way you'd get in

Michael insults Jonathan, in reference to quote #1063
insults, religion, meanness, quotes
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 16 February 2008
[edit] added: 15 February 2008

(01:50:24) Sarah: Like [his] ex and her "fiance" - they're doing fostering. [She] doesn't need children, EVAR.

(01:50:45) Sarah: It's like giving a child with autism to a 2 year old to take care of.

(01:51:26) Sarah: I'm going to Hell for that analogy.

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 26 January 2008
[edit] added: 26 January 2008

(22:53:40) [me]: it's the cheapest wine I've seen

(22:53:59) [me]: it's cheaper than like soda

(22:54:02) [me]: and bottled water

(22:54:30) Rianna: I some how doubt Jesus has been active in their area :-p

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 19 December 2007
[edit] added: 19 December 2007

(02:17:23) Aaron B: i wish i was the sky god

(02:17:32) Aaron B: i'd get tenure real fast

(02:17:45) Aaron B: "it says here on your CV that you're the Sky God?"

(02:17:49) Aaron B: "yeah, that's correct"

(02:17:53) Aaron B: BAM

(02:17:57) Aaron B: Tenure

Aaron's not even eligible for tenure, because he's a *grad student*
gradschool, academia, college, bad-ideas, religion, time-travel, stupidity
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 8 December 2007
[edit] added: 7 December 2007

(12:59:33) kesuari: god didn't invent circumstances for remembering, he invented them for happening

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 8 December 2007
[edit] added: 7 December 2007

(13:21:23) Brenda: don't listen to people in love!!! they always give bad advice

(13:21:42) Brenda: their brains go into deep freeze

(13:21:57) Brenda: it's like, tengri all over the frontal lobe, if you know what i mean

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 26 November 2007
[edit] added: 26 November 2007

(01:08:08) Sarah: I say that I have a halo and they tell me it doesn't count if it's super-glued on.

Sarah is born to write country song lyrics
sex, religion, music, sadness
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 25 November 2007
[edit] added: 25 November 2007

(15:59:40) Rianna: I sat alone in the dark one night ... I found a preacher who spoke of the light -- he'd show me the way according to him, in return for my personal check. I flipped my channel back to CNN and lit another cigarette.

(16:00:15) Rianna: i dunno, that's most sane thing ever said on a country music station

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 9 April 2007
[edit] added: 9 April 2007

Annex door creaks

Derek & Jonathan, in unison: "Ghosts!"

Derek: "Truth by concensus!"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 4 April 2007
[edit] added: 4 April 2007

"Hah. You break matzah like a goy."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 10 February 2007
[edit] added: 11 February 2007

Brenda: "That's the Chinese word for pig: ‘Jū’."

Stefan: "Yeah, where do you think the word ‘Jew’ comes from?"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 15 January 2007
[edit] added: 15 January 2007

(19:48:35) [Aladnsane]: Kosher slaughter generally seems a good idea to me. Simple. Effective. Not Traif.

[comment] [rate] 1/5

[link] heard: 10 January 2007
[edit] added: 16 January 2007

"I'm a fan of the syllable; I believe in the syllable, but some people don't."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 6 January 2007
[edit] added: 9 January 2007

Mark: "From your mouth to God's ear."

linguist: "It's an Indian mouth—he won't hear."

Mark Liberman and a woman with a good idea, at the 2007 LSA annual meeting
linguistics, religion, sadness, conferences, non-p.c.ness
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 2 October 2006
[edit] added: 7 October 2006

Rabbi Dan: "Turn to page 185. Someone once commented to me that these sidurim are like Choose Your Own Adventure books."

Gabe: "Yeah, open to a random page, and you get inscribed in the book of death."

in response to Rabbi Dan's comment in Yom Kippur services
religion, books, death
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 1 September 2006
[edit] added: 1 September 2006

18:14:37 kesuari: ummm. they have a holiday on the first day of classes?

18:14:56 kesuari: how can you have a day of classes on a holiday?

18:15:11 kesuari: isn’t that like going to work to celebrate a day off?

18:15:46 kesuari: soviets are weird.

[comment] [rate] 4/5

[link] heard: 5 June 2006
[edit] added: 5 June 2006

10:45:43 [redacted]: i think se coucher is reflexive for going to bed oneself

10:45:56 [redacted]: but "to bed, as in a woman" is probably not reflexive

10:46:30 [redacted]: (let's put it this way - if you se coucher, as in a woman, by yourself, god just killed a kitten)

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 2 June 2006
[edit] added: 2 June 2006

Jonathan: "You know how the saying goes, three Jews in a room, four opinions."

Rianna: "Three Americans in a room, two opinions. I mean, I'd rather be stereotyped as having lots of opinions instead of…not thinking."

[comment] [rate] 4/5

[link] heard: 23 May 2006
[edit] added: 27 May 2006

"I don't like that whole ‘let's be shitty to pagan goddesses’ thing."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 8 May 2006
[edit] added: 8 May 2006

[00:59] Ryan: It amuses me to see Jesus fish on cars. I always see sideways vagina.

as reportedly told to (and hence reported by) Aladnsane
sadness, freudian, politics, religion, sex, not-heard-myself
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 21 April 2006
[edit] added: 21 April 2006

"This tastes like melted lollipops."

about Manischewitz
alcohol, food, bad-ideas, religion, analogies
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 21 April 2006
[edit] added: 21 April 2006

"This Birthright haggadah has less hebrew and songs, and more ‘Come to Israel.’"

[comment] [rate] 3.5/5

[link] heard: 31 March 2006
[edit] added: 31 March 2006

"So Mohammed said to the mountain, 'Rabbi Akiva—Oh wait, let me get my glasses…'"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 27 February 2006
[edit] added: 27 February 2006

04:45:33 [Tristan]: well if you used words like god meant them to be word, there'd be no problem

[comment] [rate] 2/5

[link] heard: 7 February 2006
[edit] added: 7 February 2006

21:08:53 [me]: well, I thought "file has vanished" was an interesting way of informing me of it

21:09:09 [oberon]: Well, as far as rsync was concerned, that's what happened

21:09:20 [oberon]: one minute there's a file, the next minute there's not a file

21:09:43 [me]: yeah

21:09:49 [me]: I suppose that could be called vanishing

21:09:51 [oberon]: Would you prefer "file has committed glorious harikari, and will ride the divine wind to its 70 virgins"?

21:11:07 [me]: heh

21:11:08 [me]: yes

21:11:44 [oberon]: So go edit the rsync source =P

21:11:50 [oberon]: or even the binary

21:11:54 [oberon]: just ask grep...

21:12:21 [me]: nah

21:12:28 [me]: I already don't trust rsync

21:12:31 [oberon]: lol

21:12:32 [me]: not going to screw with its binary

21:17:27 [oberon]: Am I the only one who thinks that 70 number is kinda arbitrary?

21:17:33 [oberon]: I've always sorta wondered about that

21:17:43 [oberon]: I mean, it's not like they're all useful at once

21:18:07 [oberon]: The sort of thing you do with virgins is not something you can do with 70 without engineered infrastructure and supports

21:18:37 [oberon]: Is the next verse of the Qu'aran something about "and you will also receive a house so large, it requires 65 people to keep it clean?"

21:31:26 [oberon]: That's still counting on an awful lot of women to die virgins

21:31:34 [oberon]: And I don't think infant mortality counts here

21:34:05 [oberon]: Maybe 70 is just an average

21:34:09 [oberon]: and it's really determined by annual ratios

21:34:47 [oberon]: so, like, if you have a string of really unsexy years, 'cause the plague hits or the 70s happen or something, you get more virgins, so everyone gets 71.2 or something

21:35:47 [oberon]: So it's more like "I got 70 virgins*" and then in fine print: "*results not typical. Actual results may vary. Consult your doctor before..."

[comment] [rate] 4/5

[link] heard: 16 January 2006
[edit] added: 17 January 2006

01:04:54 [me] (Autoreply): trying to get my spaghetti sauce recipe to taste right for once

01:18:07 qatharsis: May His Noodly Appendage guide you on this endeavor.

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 4 August 2005
[edit] added: 4 August 2005

Aaron B [04:07]: i like it my way. when you become reincarnated as me in your next life, you can change it ;)

me [04:07]: … wait

me [04:07] that can't happen

me [04:08] can it?

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 15 May 2005
[edit] added: 4 July 2005

(23:37:42) Jess: omg ubuntu is amazing

(23:37:55) Jess: i worship at the shrine of ubuntu

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 4 April 2005
[edit] added: 4 April 2005

"Dude, I would, like, never get tired of being called Saint Steve."

[comment] [rate] 4/5

[link] heard: 21 March 2005
[edit] added: 21 March 2005

"Vickie, what has Brandeis taught you? You have Jesus in your livingroom and Hitler in your heart."

Floria Volynskaya in reference to Viktoriya
brandeis, non-p.c.ness, religion
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 10 February 2005
[edit] added: 10 February 2005

"My father likes ketchup on knishes. My father also likes ketchup on latkes. But he's a goy."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 8 February 2005
[edit] added: 8 February 2005

Jonathan: "The founders of modern anthropology and modern linguistics were both secular Jews."

Vickie: "The founder of modern psychology was a secular Jew."

Jon: "The founder of Christianity was a secular Jew."

[comment] [rate] 3/5

[link] heard: 14 January 2005
[edit] added: 14 January 2005

"Oh, that's not a fur coat, that's an animal!"

while watching the Magic Christian
animals, religion, misunderstandings
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 11 December 2004
[edit] added: 11 December 2004

"How did you spell 'Hannukah' when you said it?"

Jonathan to oberon, making sure he gets quote 593 right.
religion, language, weirdness, quotes
[comment] [rate] 2/5

[link] heard: 11 December 2004
[edit] added: 11 December 2004

"Are you guys getting me a chancellorship for Hannukah? I want to be chancellor of Germany for Hannukah."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 8 November 2004
[edit] added: 8 November 2004

(03:19:22) Оберон: I believe in baltimore

(03:19:25) Оберон: I'm bad with locations

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 4 September 2004
[edit] added: 10 September 2004

Aaron: "So how was Israel?"

Preston: "It was great. I mean, what can I say? I got disillusioned with some things, illusioned with others."

Aaron, and Preston Neal
politics, religion, stupidity
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 11 April 2004
[edit] added: 11 April 2004

"It's Easter and we need chicken."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 6 April 2004
[edit] added: 7 April 2004

"Why on this night do we eat .. Shmats or Matzah ..."

Corey Sands, reading the Four Questions
religion, language
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 21 February 2004
[edit] added: 21 February 2004

Anne: "Doves are anything but holy."

Nicholas: "They poo on our windows."

Anne and Nicholas in The Others
movies, religion
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 23 December 2003
[edit] added: 23 December 2003

(00:12:59) [redacted]: and OMG you're sharing 2 computers on dial up?!

(00:13:10) [redacted]: ware you crazy?

(00:13:17) me: :)

(00:13:24) me: it was three

(00:13:29) [redacted]: you are crazy, aren't you?

(00:13:33) [redacted]: you're certifiable

(00:13:36) [redacted]: THREE?@??@?

(00:13:39) [redacted]: HOLY SHIT ON A STICK!

(00:13:40) [redacted]: come on!

(00:13:43) me: four :-P

(00:13:48) [redacted]: that's like 2 kb/YR per person

(00:14:05) [redacted]: i do hope you're kidding

(00:14:05) [redacted]: about the 4

(00:14:11) [redacted]: tell me you were kidding

(00:14:15) me: no

(00:14:18) [redacted]: or i may just have a cardiac arrestr

(00:14:21) ***[redacted] dies

(00:14:21) me: I have a linux box sitting there doing nothing

(00:14:31) ***[redacted] has been magically revived

(00:14:45) ***[redacted] recalls why he died, then proceeds to die again

(00:15:04) ***[redacted] is revived again and would like to forget that FOUR computers were sharing a dialup connection

(00:15:09) [redacted]: at least its 56k, rite?

(00:15:09) [redacted]: not 28?

(00:15:32) me: uhm.. I think it's connected at 46666kbps or something right now

(00:15:58) [redacted]: well, yeah... 56k never connects at that

(00:16:39) [redacted]: but still

(00:16:41) [redacted]: holy jesus

(00:16:48) [redacted]: how long did it take to load google?!

Abe Solomon realises how hard my life is
slowness, religion, weirdness, computers
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 30 November 2003
[edit] added: 30 November 2003

Cem: "I've written 12 pages for a 5-page paper that's probably going to be 20 pages long."

Jonathan: "Wow, what are you writing about?"

Cem: "Wisdom and the bible and philosophy and socrates and shit. It's fucked up."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 7 November 2003
[edit] added: 8 November 2003

[at Lizzie's, we hear a muffled scream coming from another room]

Ben: "That's why the ice cream tastes so good—they make it from gentile children."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 20 October 2003
[edit] added: 20 October 2003

"I could go either way man, and I'm pretty sure if I get cremated I'm going to hell."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 20 October 2003
[edit] added: 20 October 2003

(01:05:09) Оберон: If the pagans are right and there's a god of language purity I'm so screwed.

(01:05:16) Оберон: Then again...so is everyone but the french.

(01:05:22) Оберон: and probably them too.

[comment] [rate] 2/5

[link] heard: 30 August 2003
[edit] added: 30 August 2003

(23:20:31) Kathryn: damn straight

(23:20:46) [me]: yeah, I am

(23:26:05) Kathryn: that was dumber than kwanzaa

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 6 August 2003
[edit] added: 6 August 2003

(00:21:26) Kathryn: .ther'es no latin for homepage, you know

(00:23:02) [me]: I bet someone's standardised some of this stuff actually

(00:23:17) Kathryn: i'm sure they have

(00:23:33) Kathryn: but those words weren't in my dictionary, and i'd rather make stuff up

(00:23:58) Kathryn: it lets me pretend i'm creating something in a subject that's older than God

[comment] [rate] 2/5

[link] heard: 27 April 2003
[edit] added: 27 April 2003

"I choose to believe what I was programmed to believe."

a robot in futurama
philosophy, religion, tv
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 24 April 2003
[edit] added: 24 April 2003

Jonathan: "This guy isn't human! Hm, he doesn't look human either."

Rameez: "None of us are human."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 21 April 2003
[edit] added: 21 April 2003

"Yeah, I tried Matzah once. Someone said it was like couscous and I was like 'I'm down with couscous' and I tried it and was like 'Where's the flavour at?'"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 13 April 2003
[edit] added: 13 April 2003

David: "If you virus my computer, I'll eat your soul."

Rameez: "How are you going to do that?"

David: "The same way I eat this shit."

as David eats granola.
food, religion, computers
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 11 April 2003
[edit] added: 11 April 2003

"Y'all isn't a useful word; it's a creation of the devi——Wait!"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: 27 March 2003
[edit] added: 28 March 2003

"You know those circus freak shows where there are people who can fit inside tennis rackets and shit? It'd be cool if you had like a guy who could fit inside a tennis racket dressed up just like Hitler. And then you have a Mussolini tennish racket guy and another one for Emperor Hirohito. And then you have these giants like eight feet tall with four arms each. And they're all dressed up like Churchill, Stalin, and Roosevelt. And they look like Vishnu. So, you know, you have this Hitler Oompaloompa and this Stalin Vishnu."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"This is one of the most famous incidents in the—Jesus Christ, fucking communist bastards. Shit."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"Ow. That was G-d getting back at me for saying 'stupid asshole Christian'."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"What would the trigger happy twin of Jesus do? That would make a good bracelet."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"Broccoli is a tool of the devil. It looks like a green brain."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"I've been reading about all these crazy Jewish cultures which may or may not have to do with my research project."

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"Don't fight your own battle; let God fight it! When he does, it's clean, it's [complete?], it's total!"

Pat Francis—apparently a big-time televangelist.
common-sense, religion, scariness, inappropriateness
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

(05:52:06) [me]: you sleeping at all?

(05:52:46) [me]: well, whatever, I'm gonna get two hours or so in.. night

(07:51:14) [oberon]: lol

(07:51:14) [me] : Away: asleep

(07:51:14) [oberon]: yeah

(07:51:17) [oberon]: I was asleep

(08:35:23) [me]: then you should've put up an away message

(08:35:23) [oberon] : Class? At this hour?

(08:35:36) [me]: no, not for another half an hour!

(13:13:47) [oberon]: wasn't feeling well

(13:13:53) [oberon]: probably from sleep deprivation

(13:14:06) [oberon]: but definitely wasn't going to sit through russian with satan playing the bongos in my head.

(13:45:54) [oberon] logged out.

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"Why do they look so freaky? Does Lowell reverse engineer people's souls?"

[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"Faith is believing what ya know ain't so."

[comment] [rate] 4/5

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"That means Mark can open it on the Shabbat thingy."

Refering to a fridge not having a light bulb.
[comment] [rate] no rating

[link] heard: unknown
[edit] added: unknown

"OOH—I still have orange Tic-Tacs. Barukh haŠem...."

[comment] [rate] no rating