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22:05:17 [Jess]: guess what i learned today
22:05:26 [Jonathan]: what?
22:05:36 [Jess]: the difference between competence and performance~!!!
…
22:05:53 [Jonathan]: so what's the difference?
22:06:29 [Jess]: narrow-minded wanna-be scientist linguists and bullshitty humanitarian science-doesn't-exist anthropologists?
(23:37:42) Jess: omg ubuntu is amazing
(23:37:55) Jess: i worship at the shrine of ubuntu
"Laura, no fucking fire."
(00:05:16) Jess: fucking chomsky would be more useful than this book
(06:23:29) Jess: i like anthropology much more for the way it thinks, rather than what it thinks about
(05:04:45) Jess: no one's as bad as you
(05:04:58) [me]: yeah, I think I might even hold records
(05:05:13) [me]: one paper due in february turned in the day grades were due in may
(05:05:29) [me]: another final paper turned in early the next semester
(05:06:06) Jess: yep
(05:06:15) Jess: you get the procrastinator award
[discussion about birth control in Kazakhstan]
Jess: "Well, there are always used kvas bottles."
Jonathan [hands Jess a glass bottle]: "Here. You know where to put it. Be my guest."
Ian: "Well, if the condom breaks, you'll know right away."
[Whole room cringes in pain.]
Ian: "Mental note: no glass condoms."
Matt: "Well, there goes my version of Cinderella ."
Jonathan: "Freckles are good."
Jess: "Yeah, they're like little specks of chocolate."
"Who wants to do do it all night with me?"
"But I want the experience of pluto shaking his face in my as... wait."
"I'm not writing it from a user's standpoint; I'm writing it from an author's standpoint."
"I don't want any balls in my pants."
"And I was like 'Yo, what happened to all my 2-hour movies?'"
"That means Mark can open it on the Shabbat thingy."
"... and sex is your female."
"Obscene has bad connotations. Sexual is just good."