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"Kids are freakin' expensive! ...Uh, not to buy, but to raise." [ view | more ]

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Interesting things said in my presence


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"Good morning [spiderplants?]. Have we photosynthesised our breakfast today?"

Mr. Lisbon in Virgin Suicides
physics, weirdness, movies
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[link] heard: unknown
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"I'm Turkish; I can eat as many fortune cookies and get as many fortunes as I want."

immediately after opening his third fortune cookie in 5 minutes (the first fortune he ate with the cookie claiming that's how they're eaten in China, (and then Turkey when we told him no), and the second fell out of the cookie when he dropped it on the floor. The third came out fine.)
culture, stupidity, food, turkisms
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"Broccoli is a tool of the devil. It looks like a green brain."

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"Yeah, I'm at Brandeis—what's this place called?"

on the phone with Tiki
stupidity, brandeis, contradiction
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"Did you just say 'Robo Williams'?"

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"'Shoelock, shoelock' -- when me and my friends used to pretend we were black and we didn't know any of the slang, we used to make up our own."

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"Tongue in cheek—that sounds like such a Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks movie."

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"I'm the one who's sleep deprived. Why are *you* delusional?"

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"The only thing I remember from Spanish is 'escucha una vez más para verificar tus respuestas.'"

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"That always freakin happens to me—I'm always thirsty."

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by Jonathan North Washington
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