firespeaker.org

Vickie: "To sleep with Vickie."

Jon: "Uhm."

Vickie: "Yeah, you know, like `to bed with me'."

Matt: "I'm not disagreeing with any of the words you've been saying."

Matt: ".. and I still have a paper to write."

Jonathan: "You're still writing it?"

Matt: "Well, I'm done, but it's not long enough."

Jonathan: "How many pages do you have left?"

Matt: "Four."

Jon: "Matt, is it a 3-5 page paper?"

"Okay, well, none of you are 10-page papers, and none of you are due on Monday. Except possibly Vickie."

Jonathan: "I mean, what sort of person founds an all girls school? I guess you have to be a rich guy with weird dreams."

Matt: "Yo."

Vickie: "Well, you vary plus-or-minus five pounds or so every day anyway."

Jon: "Yeah, I mean, I take a shit, and there goes ten pounds... I brush my teeth, and there's another five."

"Hey, do you know how to use Windows?"

Jonathan: "Whoa, there's all sorts of junk in there."

Vickie: "Yeah. It's a trash can."

Jonathan: "Well, there's like styrofoam and banana peals."

"Mmm, human subjects!"

"Don't confuse your inability to learn the operating system with problems with the operating system itself."

"And they had this story about these two bozos—what were their names? Remus and Vulcan?"