firespeaker.org

"This is chocolate and not bugs, right?"

[takes a sniff]

"Yeah, good."

"Little do you know. It looks like Maple is watching you use your computer, but she's actually watching you type your root password."

"Isn't that what freshman do? Drink, sleep around, and move in herds?"

"You know you're a classics major if you see a door labelled 'Attic Access' and you immediately think 'Dude! A secret portal to Greece!'"

"The Turks are the borg of the Mediterranean. `Resistance is futile,' you know?"

"Repetitions of sounds, words, morphemes, blah blah blah."

Nat: "If you keep speaking French, I'll be forced to hit you."

Jonathan: "What's wrong with French?"

Nat: "French sounds like ass."

Matt: "Nat, I don't know what your ass sounds like."

Nat: "I can show you."

Matt: "If it sounds like French, then okay."

[in a seductive voice]

"You say you like prime numbers? Well.... I've got something that's only divisible by one.. and itself."

oberon: "The cheese is in the fridge, the cheese is the fridge, hi-ho the dairy-o, Illegal Audio-MPEG-Header 0x54414750 at offset 0x1e0800"

Jonathan: "... Uhm.."

oberon: "What? You don't know that verse?"

Jon: "I've got a sugary beverage in my pants."

oberon: "Uh, Jon, that's not a beverage."

Jon: "No, more like a protein shake."

followed by oberon confused and grossed out, spending 30 seconds trying to come up with a "shaken, not stirred" joke and failing