firespeaker.org

Jonathan: "Чё готовишь? [What're you making?]"

Vickie: "Cauliflower."

Jonathan: "С яйцами? [With eggs?]"

Vickie: "Yep."

Jonathan: "И с флафом?! [And with marshmallow fluff?!]"

Vickie: "Yep. And with paprika and Tony's."

"It's hard to write porn from the point of view of Plato."

"I was like wait a minute, I can taste the alcohol in this, but then I realised it was the grapefruit."

"I trust a webpage more than I trust myself."

Matt: "Well, I'd rather be able to feed you than put jalapeños in it."

Vickie: "Why?"

Matt: "Because I like you more than I like jalapeños."

"My laptop's drive is never floppy; it's always hard."

"J'ai почти todo этого фильма."

"I have to file taxes in like 5 states."

"My father likes ketchup on knishes. My father also likes ketchup on latkes. But he's a goy."

Jonathan: "The founders of modern anthropology and modern linguistics were both secular Jews."

Vickie: "The founder of modern psychology was a secular Jew."

Jon: "The founder of Christianity was a secular Jew."