firespeaker.org

"Russians can totally fly while not dead."

Aladnsane: "Zavulon can fly, but he can't."

Jonathan: "Certainly not while dead…"

Jonathan: "I think I spilled margarita on my laptop."

Aladnsane: "…Dude, you're licking your laptop!"

Jonathan: "But it's sour. Wait, this could be battery acid. That would be bad."

Aladnsane: "Don't tip this. There's a beverage involved."

Jonathan: "But I like tipping things with beverages involved… like cows."

"There's another French politician who[se name] has to do with nasalisation!"

Avram: "Yeah, it's hard to work on a paper when playing rugby."

Poppy: "Hard to work on a paper a few days after playing rugby too…"

Jurgen: "You know, some people say I'm hard—I don't think I'm that hard."

Jonathan: "Well, you're flexible."

classmate: "You're the xantham gum of professors."

Avram: "Flexible, but still with integrity."

"Maybe you should implement the medieval system, where if one of the grad students misbehaves, they whip one of the undergrads."

Jonathan: "Why did the French decide to settle Louisiana? What were they thinking, with the bayous and the prehistorical aligator-looking thingies that eat you?"

Gabe: "Well, the French are frogs, right?"

Jonathan: "Well, they eat frogs."

Derek: "Maybe they were looking for Yoda."